Round 1: The Mardi Grass

Hello all and welcome to the 2012 NRL season. Despite an earlier than normal season start, the overwhelming feeling was one of relief; no longer did time have to be spent pretending to enjoy inane and worn out summer pastimes such as cricket or A-League.

As with season 2011, the Bon Jovi song ‘Our House’ was used to launch the much-hyped kick-off. But with the celebration of rugby league (at least I think that’s what it was: groups of well-built, clean shaven men in tight-fitting clothes getting affectionate with each other at the prospect of scoring) in Sydney’s east on Saturday night, news over the break of referee Matt Cecchin’s ‘playing for the other team’, the appearance on Friday night of other referee Shayne Hayne’s extremely flamboyant moustache and finally the culmination of a massive precipitation event in floods across much of New South Wales, there was a far more appropriate season-opening song.

Here is the review of the main themes of Round 1 in the NRL with the Weather Girls’ 1982 hit ‘It’s Raining Men’.

Newcastle v. St George Illawarra

Hallelujah! It’s raining…. Strangers

While this game ended up going to golden point extra time, it would have been an injustice if the Dragons had lost. They were the far better team, well-drilled, organised, structured and efficient.

However, their attack was lacking and this kept the highly disappointing Knights in the game. For a team with so much history in certain combinations, it was uncertain if they actually met each other before the game (this is only a slight exaggeration) such was their lack of cohesion and any sort of system in attack.

Given his history of simplifying the game for a talented but disparate Dragons team, many thought Wayne Bennett would have helped Newcastle start the season strongly but this was not the case.

Newcastle’s hopes of attracting the neutral supporter this season took a hit when Timana Tahu lashed out after fairly normal provocation. His ‘knee-jerk’ reaction (more jerk than knee; thanks to former tipster Steve Giudice for that one) made Tahu’s aims of State of Origin this season seem laughable.

Parramatta v. Brisbane

For the first time in history, it’s gonna start raining… Sandow disappointment…?

It all started so well, a strong first few sets, a last tackle kick by Sandow which exhibited discipline and perhaps an ability to play wet-weather rugby league, which became a Sandow try after a Brisbane mistake.

However, even though Parramatta showed some resilience in defence to keep Brisbane scoreless during the first half, the distance between Brisbane and several tries looked to be a mere focus on controlling the ball. This was what eventuated. Parramatta never looked competitive once Brisbane stopped making mistakes. Admittedly Jarryd Hayne’s absence was crucial, but it looks like being a long season for Parramatta.

Canberra v. Melbourne

Hallelujah! It’s raining…. Storm fear

Given the persistent rain which fell during this game, the standard of play was very high. Melbourne started with two excellent tries before Canberra responded with the type of play they usually only produce against the Dragons.

However, the main feature of this game was Melbourne’s risky play despite being behind for only a few minutes in the entire game. This was best represented by Cooper Cronk frequently looking to run elaborate plays, either passing or kicking, for his teammates. These were plays Melbourne rarely runs on a dry day let alone one with persistent, heavy rain.

One can only guess why Melbourne did not want to take on the bigger Canberra pack in a low-scoring contest. Melbourne was overmatched in size but they had the major edge on Canberra in experience and intelligence, yet they played as if they were the underdog.

Canberra finally crossed half-way then finally took the lead only for Melbourne to snatch it back just a few minutes later for a 5-point win.

Penrith v. Canterbury

For the first time in history, it’s gonna start raining… Injuries

Of course there have been injuries in rugby league since forever but surely it is time for an extra player or two to be on the interchange bench, who can only be inserted into the game when a player has suffered a significant injury. These injuries just happen, no-one is to blame, yet the team which suffers (in this case, Penrith) faces a tough struggle to compete from then on.

Penrith fought bravely but several late tries to the Bulldogs (which came after more injuries in addition to Michael Gordon’s broken ankle) saw the away team finish strongly for the win.

North Queensland v. Gold Coast

Hallelujah! It’s raining…. Errors

The heavily favoured Cowbores produced the worst performance of Round 1, struggling to score nil and committing a…..Tahu…..of errors in the first half.

It is very humid in Townsville so early in the calendar year but there was no rain and the Titans kept things simple enough (to be fair, they have so little talent they can’t do things in a less simple way) so they deserved all the laughter and scorn from me that they received.

The Titans could hardly believe their luck. Scott Prince can now almost be timed with a calendar and has been on the downhill side of his career for 3 years, they signed 10 props in the off-season but no hooker, five-eighth or fullback but somehow they defeated a team with Feral Thurston and Bowen. Everyone who watched this was poorer for the experience.

New Zealand v. Manly

For the first time in history, it’s gonna start raining… A good grand final re-match

We saw this fairly often in recent years, but finally Round 1 2012 got a well-played match. Even better, it was in a grand final re-match, which so often disappoint.

Manly started brilliantly well, looking to move the ball when possible and exploiting the Warriors defence. Their first 20 minutes was top-shelf, but the Warriors responded with Shaun Johnson mesmerising Manly’s defence.

Manly looked to have won the game early in the second half but the Warriors responded again. In the end, Manly won it after an opportunistic try to Glenn Stewart.

In all, a highly entertaining game, but what have the Warriors done to deserve consecutive years of teams playing brilliantly well against them to start the season?

Wests Tigers v. Cronulla

Hallelujah! It’s raining…. Early-season heat and humidity

Leichhardt Oval is a lot like the Eiffel Tower or the Taj Mahal: they look great on television or on a postcard but they fill up easily, especially in peak season and it can take hours to move anywhere when this happens. Oh and there’s annoying people in the vicinity trying to sell you hot dogs, magazines or replicas of the monument.

Sunday saw the crowds flock to Leichhardt but the week’s crazy weather, which looked like producing more rain, instead provided stifling heat and humidity. When this combined with the heavy-ish track, it was hardly surprising that an outbreak of cramp hit late in the game.

While the home team started well and led most of the way, their failure to take opportunities and a bunch of second half mistakes meant Cronulla should have taken the win. Cronulla was upset by what they perceived to be a series of refereeing mistakes, but at least they have 7 days to prepare after this gruelling match. The Tigers have just five days and the challenge of Manly, who had it much easier (climate-wise).

South Sydney v. Sydney Roosters

For the first time in history, it’s gonna start raining… LOL@$50uffs

It looked to be an intriguing battle in Round 1’s final game, with Souths’ monster pack and all-round size but new-look (through injury and player turnover) ‘spine’ against the Roosters, with their settled, experienced ‘spine’ but a smaller pack of forwards.

A very similar battle took place in 2010. The Roosters won then, but this was played on a warm afternoon. Last night’s game was played in much cooler conditions, which favoured Souths, but the late withdrawal of Anasta gave the home team a greater edge.

Hilariously, Souths failed to capitalise. They were so dominant for most of the game; it seemed that almost every Souths’ run would leave the Roosters looking like nine-pins, while the Roosters struggled mightily to get any field position.

Somehow, the Roosters scored two tries from rare attacking forays but errors and needless penalties gave up field position that even Souths could not fail to score from.

Leading 20-12 with only a few minutes left, Souths stopped attacking. Rookie halfback Reynolds could have put in an attacking kick and perhaps regained possession, but instead kicked the ball hard across the dead ball line.

After a silly penalty, the Roosters scored from the next set and had one chance to win the game. Pearce’s sidesteps somehow led to an opening and Cordner’s kick through was re-gathered by Minichiello for an incredible win.

Losing after being up by 8 with only minutes remaining?

Sutton getting injured after starting a break downfield as well as losing the ball (who else could do this)?

Souths having perhaps the best player in the league at left centre but being almost incapable of getting him the ball?

Their supporters, before the game, holding up banners of the years in ancient history when Souths won premierships but which have greater resonance with people under the age of 70 as the average attendance levels for Souths during the halcyon days of the mid 1990s?

LOL@50uff$

See you next week.

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